Friday, December 31, 2010

MMXL

As i sit here in this room , music in my ear , distraction free editor in front of me i can feel thousands of people thanking god for a new year from tomorrow , even thousands more making resolutions and even more partying .. Yet why do i sit here ?

For me, a new year means nothing . Its just another day . Does it mean anything ? The earth just spinning around its own axis , and just revolving around the sun - Night turning into Day , Day turning into Night .

What i'm more concerned is, in this abstract new year what am i going to do that will make me sit 1 year from now and write something better, and tell all ya'll that i've actually done something.

Let me pause .

Let me look back .

What've i done ?

Gotten a Camera ?

Gotten into SAP ?

Graduated with high scores ?

Got a mac ?

Do you think any of that matters when you sit back and think about what you actually have done ?

Materialism. Hmf!

I think i'mma ready for more .

Yes i have a Canon Rebel XSI, Yes i'm in SAP , Yes I got high scores, Yes i have a mac .

But with all this .. is there something i can do ? Is there something that i can do differently that will make people notice me ? Is there something that i can do, to make a difference ?

I want to . And i must.

This is not a resolution that i'm going to make cause i dont believe in planning for the future yet since i dont see a necessity in doing so right now (sorry dad.)

But this is more of a Resolve.

This is more of a mindset.

This is more of becoming more me.

This is the path that i need to follow . This is the path not formed. This is the path i'm sure that my dad would like me take simple because there is no path . I need to make one.

And this i dont do for my dad or for any other soul in this world. This i do for myself. I need this . I need to break free. I need to carve a name for myself .

Yea i suck .

I know i do .

I know few languages

I know somethings more

I know that i can do a few things better than the rest of the people around me

But now i want to put those few things to a test.

Can i actually do something with all of things that i can do better ?

I know i can .

I know i will .

If not ACTUALLY do something, i know that i will make an attempt.

Because once you start making a path for yourself .. people will eventually start helping you . Your family, your friends. Yes they matter simply because i cant do this on my own . I need people to stand beside me . I dont want a leader, I dont want to lead . Its a pain.

So i say to you all here . And at 9:10 PM on the 31st December 2010

I SUCK . I WILL BECOME BETTER .

Watch for a post in 1 year .

But thats all for this year .

Before i get leaving ,

I love you dad , mom .

and I love you guys (you all know who you are)

and dad , i always stick to what i said, i'm sorry if its harsh but not many people matter to me in the world.

You all are my world and i'm happy with it .

Fuck off 2010 .

You started making the new me . 2011 will add on to that .

Thursday, December 9, 2010

3 days of pause and 2 stories to tell

its not often that somedays mean something. Its not often that someone inspires you so much that you think of what you're currently doing.

Today, was one such non-often day. And so was yesterday and the day before just that i didnt realize it.

on 11th i have my exam , exam? not really .. more like exams! 2 of them to be precise but here i am, so bloody happy and writing this experience of mine when some peoples will argue that i should just shut the laptop and go study, Meh. Buzz off (those) peoples.

It all started off with a requirement. Like anything else, like any software program, like any thing that requires some work. The requirement was a video that had to be made. For a promotional purpose. And i, was chosen to be the lead and being frank, at first i wasn't very excited.

And in came 'someone' and his team. For all intents and purposes, let us just call him - Mr. M. He prposed an idea that took me aback and that 'first-not-being-excited' me was completely replaced by 'second-excited-and-nothing-more' me. For security reasons (i never thought that i'd ever say stuff like this :P) i cannot disclose the video or the idea.

But what i'm going to tell you is more that just about a video or an idea. Its what they call a 'life story'

~

Before that. In codetalk, you saw a passion of mine. There is one more that i haven't spoken about - Media - Photography, videography, graphic designing and things on those same lines. Now i'm saying all this so easily because the 'life story' is something that makes all these passions of mine smaller than ever.

~

Coming back. 3 days of shooting with Mr. M, as awesome as they were wasn't even as close to awesome as those 20 minutes in the luxury of the Honda Civic. He runs a video production company in Bangalore and is one of the most successful corporate film makers and in my view, is just plain vanilla awesome!

With him, he had 2 stories to tell me . And i, was just rethinking everything by the time he finished. I hope it is not copyright problems Mr. M but i am going to tell them these 2 stories.

**

Story #1

How dedicated do you think you are ? How much do you BELIEVE you can achieve ? How much do you think you've already achieved ? How much do you think that you've achieved that you're proud of . If you're reading this, then the answer to all those questions is - NOTHING.

Mr. M has had this company for over 20 odd years and 10 years ago , along came a night watchman from an agency . Regular old night watchman putting pegs, chasing dogs, knowing no englist, going to sleep.

But 10 years later today . He stands to be the backbone of Mr. M's company.
And 10 years later today . He was appraised by his boss as "It would fall without him ya"
And 10 years later today . He was dedicated enough 10 years ago to bother as to what was happening inside the place he was watchman-ing and not just care about the night.
And 10 years later today . He can converse with the clients in pure english and handle things by himself.
And 10 years later today . A man who used to probably walk/bus in to work, has bought himself a bike that he can use.
And 10 years later today . An ex-night-watchman, nay a professional video editor takes care of his brothers studies and has got his sister married.

And i ask you once again 10 seconds after you've read all that

"have you done anything that is significant?"

think about it.

**

Story #2

He started off with a video library renting out tapes that he went up to Delhi to buy.

He moved in to videographing birthdays and weddings

He started off a little by little and moved into the professional way of doing things

He has done linear editing with 2 tape reels and editing MANUALLY.

He has done graphics with "4" colours, yes not 4k or 4B or 4M colours , just FOUR.

He is one of the most renounced corporate film makers now.

He was with me for the past 3 days.

He is Mr. M

There is no limit to what i learnt over these 3 days . There is no limit to what i will be learning more from you .

~

I'm afraid i have to say that he tipped my interests 51% to 49% in favour of Media over Programming.

Lets see if that still stays by me or someone else comes by me to make that a 50% 50% like how it was till the civic ride.

~

I'd just like to say Kudos to you Mr. M and thanks for everything.

It was a pleasure shooting with you and learning from you .

Mr. M, i salute thy !

m(_ _)m