30 Fupees

Photography is an art . Good photography makes people go wow . Great photography makes it to the media . The best photography , simply makes you cry .

But just the love for photography can make you something greater than all that

It can unite.
It can make friends.
It can take 2 people and make them realize that they have about 5000 things in common .

This Post , is dedicated to that person who made me shatter most of my rules.

......

When do you trust a person ?

I started trusting you without knowing . I started trusting you when you said nice-to-meet-you ?

But why ? I think i'd like to relate this to something from the harry potter movies . Priori Incantatem.

I think that we .. we were just made to be friends . We just lived somewhere else all this while .

I've really had nice time ever since the bus and i think i owe most of it to all the 200+ texts , the multitasking and you .

......

I think thats the wierd thing about friends . You end up being close to them without even knowing that you are close to them and one sulky saturday you end up waiting for them to get up just so that the texting spree can begin .

I think thats the wierd thing about friends . They just become friends without you telling them that they are your friends .

I think thats the wierd thing about friends . You know that they will just stick

I think thats the wierd thing about friends . You can tell them something that you havent even brought yourself to believe yet .

I think thats the wierd thing about friends . 2:30 doesnt seem late.

I think thats the wierd thing about friends . They're the best .

......

So , Understand that when i tell you , you're a friend and ,

We are going to be the same for a really long time.

Every day we're going to keep incrementing the #5000 counter.

There are going to be way more ftories to share and

Honestly it-was-nice-meeting-you so just hear me out,

And please throw them away.

......

30 Fupees isn't a lot of money . But its a lot of pain .

MMXL

As i sit here in this room , music in my ear , distraction free editor in front of me i can feel thousands of people thanking god for a new year from tomorrow , even thousands more making resolutions and even more partying .. Yet why do i sit here ?

For me, a new year means nothing . Its just another day . Does it mean anything ? The earth just spinning around its own axis , and just revolving around the sun - Night turning into Day , Day turning into Night .

What i'm more concerned is, in this abstract new year what am i going to do that will make me sit 1 year from now and write something better, and tell all ya'll that i've actually done something.

Let me pause .

Let me look back .

What've i done ?

Gotten a Camera ?

Gotten into SAP ?

Graduated with high scores ?

Got a mac ?

Do you think any of that matters when you sit back and think about what you actually have done ?

Materialism. Hmf!

I think i'mma ready for more .

Yes i have a Canon Rebel XSI, Yes i'm in SAP , Yes I got high scores, Yes i have a mac .

But with all this .. is there something i can do ? Is there something that i can do differently that will make people notice me ? Is there something that i can do, to make a difference ?

I want to . And i must.

This is not a resolution that i'm going to make cause i dont believe in planning for the future yet since i dont see a necessity in doing so right now (sorry dad.)

But this is more of a Resolve.

This is more of a mindset.

This is more of becoming more me.

This is the path that i need to follow . This is the path not formed. This is the path i'm sure that my dad would like me take simple because there is no path . I need to make one.

And this i dont do for my dad or for any other soul in this world. This i do for myself. I need this . I need to break free. I need to carve a name for myself .

Yea i suck .

I know i do .

I know few languages

I know somethings more

I know that i can do a few things better than the rest of the people around me

But now i want to put those few things to a test.

Can i actually do something with all of things that i can do better ?

I know i can .

I know i will .

If not ACTUALLY do something, i know that i will make an attempt.

Because once you start making a path for yourself .. people will eventually start helping you . Your family, your friends. Yes they matter simply because i cant do this on my own . I need people to stand beside me . I dont want a leader, I dont want to lead . Its a pain.

So i say to you all here . And at 9:10 PM on the 31st December 2010

I SUCK . I WILL BECOME BETTER .

Watch for a post in 1 year .

But thats all for this year .

Before i get leaving ,

I love you dad , mom .

and I love you guys (you all know who you are)

and dad , i always stick to what i said, i'm sorry if its harsh but not many people matter to me in the world.

You all are my world and i'm happy with it .

Fuck off 2010 .

You started making the new me . 2011 will add on to that .

3 days of pause and 2 stories to tell

its not often that somedays mean something. Its not often that someone inspires you so much that you think of what you're currently doing.

Today, was one such non-often day. And so was yesterday and the day before just that i didnt realize it.

on 11th i have my exam , exam? not really .. more like exams! 2 of them to be precise but here i am, so bloody happy and writing this experience of mine when some peoples will argue that i should just shut the laptop and go study, Meh. Buzz off (those) peoples.

It all started off with a requirement. Like anything else, like any software program, like any thing that requires some work. The requirement was a video that had to be made. For a promotional purpose. And i, was chosen to be the lead and being frank, at first i wasn't very excited.

And in came 'someone' and his team. For all intents and purposes, let us just call him - Mr. M. He prposed an idea that took me aback and that 'first-not-being-excited' me was completely replaced by 'second-excited-and-nothing-more' me. For security reasons (i never thought that i'd ever say stuff like this :P) i cannot disclose the video or the idea.

But what i'm going to tell you is more that just about a video or an idea. Its what they call a 'life story'

~

Before that. In codetalk, you saw a passion of mine. There is one more that i haven't spoken about - Media - Photography, videography, graphic designing and things on those same lines. Now i'm saying all this so easily because the 'life story' is something that makes all these passions of mine smaller than ever.

~

Coming back. 3 days of shooting with Mr. M, as awesome as they were wasn't even as close to awesome as those 20 minutes in the luxury of the Honda Civic. He runs a video production company in Bangalore and is one of the most successful corporate film makers and in my view, is just plain vanilla awesome!

With him, he had 2 stories to tell me . And i, was just rethinking everything by the time he finished. I hope it is not copyright problems Mr. M but i am going to tell them these 2 stories.

**

Story #1

How dedicated do you think you are ? How much do you BELIEVE you can achieve ? How much do you think you've already achieved ? How much do you think that you've achieved that you're proud of . If you're reading this, then the answer to all those questions is - NOTHING.

Mr. M has had this company for over 20 odd years and 10 years ago , along came a night watchman from an agency . Regular old night watchman putting pegs, chasing dogs, knowing no englist, going to sleep.

But 10 years later today . He stands to be the backbone of Mr. M's company.
And 10 years later today . He was appraised by his boss as "It would fall without him ya"
And 10 years later today . He was dedicated enough 10 years ago to bother as to what was happening inside the place he was watchman-ing and not just care about the night.
And 10 years later today . He can converse with the clients in pure english and handle things by himself.
And 10 years later today . A man who used to probably walk/bus in to work, has bought himself a bike that he can use.
And 10 years later today . An ex-night-watchman, nay a professional video editor takes care of his brothers studies and has got his sister married.

And i ask you once again 10 seconds after you've read all that

"have you done anything that is significant?"

think about it.

**

Story #2

He started off with a video library renting out tapes that he went up to Delhi to buy.

He moved in to videographing birthdays and weddings

He started off a little by little and moved into the professional way of doing things

He has done linear editing with 2 tape reels and editing MANUALLY.

He has done graphics with "4" colours, yes not 4k or 4B or 4M colours , just FOUR.

He is one of the most renounced corporate film makers now.

He was with me for the past 3 days.

He is Mr. M

There is no limit to what i learnt over these 3 days . There is no limit to what i will be learning more from you .

~

I'm afraid i have to say that he tipped my interests 51% to 49% in favour of Media over Programming.

Lets see if that still stays by me or someone else comes by me to make that a 50% 50% like how it was till the civic ride.

~

I'd just like to say Kudos to you Mr. M and thanks for everything.

It was a pleasure shooting with you and learning from you .

Mr. M, i salute thy !

m(_ _)m

5 months and 14 days later

when i entered that majestic place. Little did i know that it would completely reform me

little did i know that i'd be friends

with a yarn spinner
with a guy who sat there solving a math book
with a guy who had a swahili note written on his back
with a guy who was a genius at math
with a guy who i showed off to the first day
with a guy who well, is either the major entertainer or the entertainee

Everyone was something.
Everyone was interesting.
Everyone

Everyone helped me

be me.

Alfy
Sam
Terry
Andrew
Jerry
Vivek

this is one of those tributes. I just wanted to say kudos to all you bastards for being there for me when i needed each one of ya'll

We're all in different places now.

Some of us are in touch
Some of us dont even reply to chats.

But i truly know that all those times we spent together .. we each will cherish till we lose our breath.

Because its not only for me .. All of us changed in those 3 years.

You ate curd rice
you spoke kannada
you learnt tamil
you finally made me say "my friend and i"
you gave up non veg
you became more .. you

as i said earlier

8
151
39
11
25
33

are numbers i aint gona forget

be you dead
be you alive
be you another person now

you are part of this nostalgia that got tears down my eyes now.

ya'll mean some shit to me. and always will .

19th march 2009 is a day , i truly wont forget.

thank you .

yes, you can hit me now.

5 months and 14 days later , nostalgia found its way to me.

Codetalk

if there is 1 thing i havent written about in here .

it is the 1 thing that i love doing the most.

it is the 1 thing that i've neglected

simply because i know i'm really good at it.

simply because we're obstructed by boundaries

simply because i have no whiteboard

i write this at 1:30 . at one of the most productive times in my day . at one of the most productive times in our day.

our ?

well , theres one other person that i expect to read this post. theres one other person who is as passionate as i am. and yes i've only seen one other person.

theres a passion we share.
theres a light that burns somewhere.
theres a place we need to get to
and that place is yet to be seen too.

but get there we will
simply because we know we will
and fuck you all we say
because we know that we'll stay

we live in different place
we live in different companies
and we do different things

but somehow it seems as if there is this 1 thing that we were meant to do together

but lets keep that talk for another day.

if there is 1 thing i havent written about in here .

means that i treasure that thing the most .

but something today made me to write it .. and i think i'm gona come out and say it ..

Many people , many readers of this post might at this point of time think that i'm jsut another guy who lives his life.

but i beg to differ.

i am not just another guy
i just act like one.

simply because it aint time to tell you all who i am .
and the other part of 'our' know who i truly am .

why you may say ?

Many people, many readers of this post might at this point of time think that he is just another guy who lives his life.

but he begs to differ

he is not just another guy.
he just acts like one.

thats why i say .

--

i dont know how far before. But there was one point of time that among the people i respect , my dad showed me this line of code. This programming language that seemed to interest me .

This #
this includes
and this main()

something there .. was my calling .

something there .. was my life.

something there .. made me who i am today .

i dont really know what i saw in that but the amount of things you can do with those predefined set of statements is something truly amazing .

But there are restrictions - the boundaries we cant jump over.

we're forced into 1 way .
we're forced into a way that they claim has been perfected.
we're forced into 3d id cards
and we're forced into bad interfaces .

we already know who we're talking about.

--

What is so confusing in this ? My dad asked .

I said . "This functions aint even getting in to my head!"

today ,

its what i use the most .

Modularization is one of my most favourite concepts.

oh hell ya . code

--

I'm not sure when you got this nac of yours from

maybe its from getting the 10 Rupees and telling your dad that if there is less that 3 Rs left over , its yours .. else it'll be given back to him

today ,

thats still what you do .

Make deals

oh hell ya . Talk.

--

Encryption , cryptography and writing something thats really hard to understand have always fascinated me ..

Hell even this post is cryptographic .

But who needs to .. will know what i mean and will know whats going in mah head right now.

darn it .

i so wish i had 9840024961 and a whiteboard. an actual one.

--

screw them
screw them

we'll walk alone

and i'm sure more'll join

i'm sure that there are people who think like us . who act like us simply cause society has put hurdles on their paths too.

lets break em open.

lets talk them out of it .

or lets GOTO them to a different place.

lets start at 0

lets go to qswawdes.

maybe not now .

because now is still too early for us to GOTO and to talk .

lets start slow .

lets start patiently .

but let it be us.

like i already said

we is who we were meant to be.

--

what do you say?

nevermind_a ?